RECEPTIVE

I don't receive criticism well. I just don't.

And I wish I did, because it's not like I think I know it all. I know I have so much to learn, even in the areas where I feel like I know a lot. There's a pride issue here... I'm aware.

Recently I got what the earth likes to call "rejected." Not a fun thing to talk about or receive. The moment after the rejection began an evening-long battle of worth. I literally felt like I was in a battle of choosing who determined my worth. And I'm familiar with all the details of God's purpose, and how cool I am (LOL), and that I'm a young woman that anyone would be lucky to have... I know, I know. But it stings. And that's okay that it stings.

So I did what I do best: run away. Literally. I put on my shoes, changed my clothes, and went for a run. I allowed my endorphins to help my mind refocus on who I am and who my Father says I am. The farther I allowed myself to get away from the moment (literally and mentally), the better look I was able to have of it.

The commands I know Holy Spirit has whispered to my heart like be honest early, share your story, speak of Jesus like He's a tangible human in your day-to-day, can sometimes cause me to be set apart or "overlooked" by the world around me. I tell ya what though... the peace is insane. The breaths I take are deeper the more honest I am with others. Some people tell me I take things too seriously. Maybe so.

But there's no part of my heart I'm willing to take lightly.

If I was unwilling to receive this person's rejection, I would find myself in a state of need to perform or shift a behavior that is not part of my story anymore. I'm seeing the power in reception without identification. The power in reception and replacement. The power that comes when we replace the world's "rejection" for the truth that the only acceptance our heart yearns for is the one Jesus died for us to have.